Friday, April 1, 2011

Veggie Burgers and Budweiser Select 55

Hey there ladies and germs!

Well, it’s springtime once again - although if you take a gander outside it looks like someone forgot to tell Mother Nature! I mean, SNOW in APRIL? So much for Global Warming! Now that’s what I call an Inconvenient Truth, am I right?! Boy, am I a hoot today or what?

Anyway, Kyle and I recently had our annual Boys’ Night, where we celebrate the start of spring the only way we know how – with burgers and beer – only this time, we did it with a Spring twist! That’s right! We grilled up some veggie burgers and threw back a couple Bud Select 55s!

It's so light, Kyle almost floated away! LOL!

You see, as we all know, Summer is right around the corner, and that means two words: Beach bods! We only have a few short months to get from “All he eats is bacon” to “is he taken?” (I’m so bad.)

But just because we’re watching our figure doesn’t mean we can’t still enjoy ourselves! That’s why Kyle and I decided to let loose, get a little crazy and throw our aprons on for a beautiful meal. 

The first rule of grilling, as you know, is that you’d better have a beer in hand, so we cracked open a couple Bud Select 55s. (Only 55 calories? Sign me up!) The first thing I noticed was an intense rush of alcohol from the beer’s mammoth 2.4% ABV content. I immediately handed Kyle my car keys as I knew this night could easily get out of hand.

If it looks like beef, and it smells like beef, it's probably methylcellulose!

Then, the two of us started shaping our burger patties. I won’t bore you with the minutiae of creating fresh Veggie burgers – it’s exactly the same as regular burgers, except that instead of that fatty old red meat, you’re greeted with the enchanting aromas of textured vegetable proteins, soy protein isolate, vegetable gum, and maltodextrin. Great, now I’ve done it – my mouth is watering! Someone get me a towel!

We plated our burger patties (no buns, of course…who needs the carbs??) and retreated to the dining room where Kyle had put together a breathtaking table (very Art Nouveau, with a hint of postmodern industrial cubism). I’m kicking myself for not taking a good picture of it – but by that point I was nearly done with my Bud 55 and could hardly hold the camera.

So, we happily munched away, just two best friends enjoying a healthier interpretation of a greasy classic, until we could munch no more. And at the same time, we looked at each other and came to a sad realization…

“Oh no! Not the dishes!!!”

Happy Spring, my special friends!


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